Two aliens land in Iowa and the first "life form" they meet is a gas pump. Alien Aahzon introduces himself to the pump and asks where he might find Earth's leader. Getting no reply, Alien Oohzon warns the unresponsive pump that Aahzon has a very short fuse so he better start talking sooner rather than later.
The gas pump stands like a statue. Sure enough, Aahzon draws his ray gun and fires at the pump just as Oohzon screams belatedly to wait. The gas pump explodes sending the aliens flying 500 feet.
When the aliens regain consciousness, Aahzon asks his companion how he knew not to shoot the Earthling. Oohzon replies that you don't fuck with any guy who can wrap his dick around himself twice and then stick it in his ear.
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